Going to bed the other night i noticed people in
my shed stealing things.
I phoned the police but was told no one was in
the area to help. They said they would send
someone over as soon as possible. I hung up.
A minute later i rang again. 'Hello,' i said, 'i
called you a minute ago because there were two
people in my shed. You don't have to hurry now
because i have shot them both.' within minutes
there were half a dozen police cars plus
helicopters and an armed response unit. They
caught the burglars red-handed. One of the
officers said: 'i thought you said you'd shot
them.' to which i replied:
' i thought you said there was no one available.'